Meditation Monday

A Favorite Quote

You should never lose site of the importance of having a realistic attitude- of being very sensitive to and respectful of the concrete reality of your situation as you proceed on the patch toward your ultimate goal. Recognize the difficulties inherent in your path, and the fact that it may take time and consistent effort. It’s also important to make a clear distinction in your mind between your ideals and the standards by which you judge your progress.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama
-M-

The Good That Won’t Come Out

I don’t mean to be selfish. I find it so funny to even be writing this. I suppose that somewhere in between time and space we all arrive to this point and realize the obvious and accept it. But, it’s different this time. It finally is. Breathing has become harder, presumably, yet I have found the good in suffocating a little bit. And not in a malicious kind of way, but in a way that makes the heavy moments worth it, tolerable even.

“The lows are so extreme that the good seems fucking cheap.”
(Yes, thank you, Jenny. We know. I know.)

And so I’m beginning to swim in the soup and every fucking cliché line is jumping out and splashing me. The present is becoming more of a factor and I feel as if I’m falling in love all over again with the thought of it all. I’m seeping freedom and clarity that the ability to experience it all is sometimes too much to endure. But I fight. I jump out and splash right back.

I’m utterly ecstatic at the chance to live. I need to stop hiding.

-Stacey Renberg

Shame Dame

I don’t want to be an embarrassment anymore.
I don’t want to hang my head down low anymore.

I want to want to be myself.
I want to want to live.

But above it all,
I want to be satisfied with who I am
so I can leave my cocoon
and not be so fucking ashamed
to call myself by my own name,
or look you in the eyes
and tell you how I feel.

-Stacey Renberg

Tea Hacic.


Tea HacicTea Hacic, also known as Sugartits, is a magnificent self-help guru on Tumblr and many other places. She gives unique advice about growing up, love, sex, and of course life. When Tea isn’t answering questions, she is a writer for Vice, WIRED, and Bullet Media. If that weren’t enough, Tea also has a show on Bullet TV called “Everything is Embarrassing.” Tea isn’t your typical writer, especially because she sometimes writes in Italian, but also because she isn’t afraid to say what everyone else is trying to hide. She is a spit fire who answers life’s terrifying questions and does so with big eyes, red lips, and a hair flip. Check her out, fall in love, and enjoy your daily dose of Tea on her Instagram.


What’s your name?
Tea Hacic

How old are you?
26

How old do you feel?
15

What makes you feel remarkable?
My writing and my butt.

If you are having a sub-par day, what do you do &/or say to make yourself feel good again?
I get dressed up and drunk.

Where do you think love hides?
In shitty bars.

When do you feel most loved?
Hugging my husband.

What inspired you to put yourself out there on the internet?
Loneliness!

Do you receive much negativity on your tumblr site? if so, how do you deal with it?
I surprisingly haven’t gotten much negativity!! When I do, I remember that people willing to waste time sending hate to strangers have their own problems and you shouldn’t take what they say seriously.

What is your favourite rainy day activity?
Watching cartoon network and eating cereal.

What do you think is the most beautiful thing about people?
The way they laugh at things. The way they keep waking up and getting up and doing stuff even though life is hard.

When you hear the word “beautiful” what image immediately pops up in your mind?
My mama!

When you hear the word “love” what sound resonates in your ears?
The sound of my husband saying, “Amore!” when he wants beer.

When you started your tumblr what were your expectations?
I expected to get a few eyes and a few readers.

Did you expect to become such a self-help goddess?
I had no idea that would happen! I just wanted to share my stories.

What makes you feel hope?
Space. Knowing how small and stupid we all are.

Who do you think is a remarkable person?
A single mom.

How much do you think you’ve changed in the last ten years?
I’ve changed tremendously in that I’ve stopped torturing myself. I’ve discovered who I am as an artist and how to not over-pluck my eyebrows.

What is the best thing that has happened to you in the last year?
I moved to New York!

Where do you get your confidence?
From daydreaming about what I wish I could do.

Why do you think feminism is important?
Because women deserve to have at least the same basic human rights as men! Duh!

How did you find your inner goddess/gaga/beyonce?
By listening to the right music.

What are your favorite things?
Cartoons, chocolate and the way my eyes look after a night of drinking and crying.

Where do you live?
New york.. It’s busy and fast like a slutty teenager.

What should others do to make the world a better place?
Be nice to each other.

What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
Don’t give up!

What is one piece of advice you would tell your high-school self?
You’re good enough.

How do you deal with failure?
I push through it.

What’s the most recent random act of kindness you’ve witnessed?
Someone giving ten dollars to a street performer.

When will your book finally come out!?
As soon as I find a reliable publisher! I have decided to name the book “Just The Tip,” so that’s some progress.

Any final last words for our readers?
I love you!

Meditation Monday

Ode To Feet

At one point in my life, I really hated my feet. They are small with hobbit-like qualities; not the kind of feet any girl wants. Vienna sausage toes- add glitter, pearl, or color changing polish and you get… Fancy Vienna sausage toes. These oh-so-fancy feet are even a half size different. You are useless! What good are you, feet?!

So good.

So good, in fact, I’m learning to really love them. They march to the beats of my own percussion. They support me even when I’m not feeling as strong as they are. They dance my blues away. They hike me up the Tetons, and balance me in natarajasana. They wear a symbol for my siblings proudly. They are the classiest in Betsy and ready for battle in Earth.

But, I love them most when they’re just havin’ a groovy, tattooed, glittered mini sausage wiggling, grass loving, hang out at the arboretum kind of day.

-M-

Toys

It’s the lime green and sky blue that sends me to the dream world whenever I walk up the stairs. I imagine entering the room and seeing nothing but vast grassy hills and fluffy clouds forever. There is no sound just a light breeze flowing in through the space where there is no window, but a square cut out of the wall, rough edges and paint peeling. There is something red but it’s unclear, just an inanimate object, maybe a wooden chair. The room is empty as I stand and place my hands on the windowsill. I desire to jump, to plummet into the tall skinny plants, to feel that goddamn breeze on my face, on my skin. I can breathe. I am relaxed. I am calm.

For reasons unknown, this vision, this dream world, takes me back to my childhood, yet my memory is altered and changed. My surroundings are unfamiliar and my acquaintances peculiar. The Robin Williams movie, Toys, is the only visual example I can compare it to. One day I will find that dream world and roll in the grass for hours. I will eat vitamin sandwiches and become a real life paper doll. I will learn stealthy techniques from L. L. Cool J and I will dance in the snow to Christmas music. It’s wonderful, isn’t it? I can still remember the infinite sky, the awkwardness of being a kid and the yearning to be alone to dream about the future. Some things never change.

-Stacey Renberg